Your Parents and Your Film Taste?

[captainofbeef]

I am just wondering, does your odd (to most people) film taste get you into trouble with your parents? Like do they restrict what type of movies you see or at least attempt to censor your viewing choices?

I have been noticing this trend with my mom lately and it really has started to piss me off. She has never done anything with my choices in music, film, or books before. My father and her have always approved of my film choices because they know I am more knowledgeable about film than they are. But with the last two rentals I made at Blockbuster, my mom began to question the content of the films I was renting. She even went as far to tell me to pick a different movie. Of course, I ignored her completely and rented the films anyway, but she had an outburst about how I'm not normal and she thinks I should try to watch normal films.

That line really got me going. I almost screamed as I was standing in Blockbuster. It was a good thing my dad was there to calm me down. Honestly, at sixteen years old, I think I am old enough to distinguish what titles I am able to handle (which is almost all of them) and what I can't handle. The most upsetting thing about this occurrence and the following one is that this stuff only started to happen after I told my parents I did not believe in the Catholic Church. I thought that they would understand and accept my beliefs, because after all, I am their son and I do have an opinion of my own. Instead, they were outraged and my mom went off on a tangent about how I have bad influences and what not. I think my little coming out, if thats how you want to put it, spurred here decision to attempt to censor what I take in.

Anyway, I just needed to get that out of my system somewhere, somehow. So if you want to discuss the topic or comment about my story, here is the place to do it.

[criterionmaster]

Fantastic topic and story as much as it irritates me. I will use this time to get this quote out, from a movie-watching master, far more advance than everyone I know, and everyone on here, combined. This guy was talking about how people don't find him normal and his tastes were different than most, and he said "what is normal, anyways? Being like everyone else? That seems like it would be a bad thing. In prison it is probably normal to be a rapist." It got me to laugh, but it is also true. I hate when people say something I do isn't "normal" since the whole meaning of that word, and the way the person says it, is that they want you to be like them, and everyone else, and can't take someone trying something, or acting, like they aren't used to.

My parents don't ever try and stop me from renting something, although sometimes they joke about it. They do however complain once in a while about my choices in film, and my hatred for new films, and how much I express my opinions and stuff. But they aren't too bad about it, they will still watch anything I tell them to watch, no matter the language or whatever, I mean they watched the 6 hour TV version of Fanny and Alexander with me, and it is one of their favorites now.

Me and my dad always joke about Salo, when I compare how "dirty" the films I watch are, I normally say "it isn't as bad as Salo". If they knew I was watching hardcore porno though, albeit in the form of a cult film or whatever (Emanuelle), they might care, but oh well.

Not to mention your beliefs are yours, and the way they are going about this by censoring (one of the worst things in the world) is not the right way at all. Not to mention (again), if you actually watched "normal films" you would probably be closer to suicide right now, and not the Catholic faith.

God, it is so stupid when people tell me to be normal, or watch normal movies.

[captainofbeef]

LOL! My dad just got home and my mom went up to him and said, "Look what your son got at Blockbuster. "This movie called Straw Dogs, its called the most controversial film of its decade on the back. Don't you think this would be a bad influence on him?" My dad proceeds to say, "Nope, I've seen that movie. It a damn good one." Then he walks upstairs. My dad can be the man sometimes, lol.

[sacrilegend]

My dad got me into some really cool things I'm pretty grateful for - David Lynch, Jim Jarmusch, The Tin Drum, Frida, Monty Python, etc. And I'm usualyl the one who says I don't want to watch gruesome films with him, and him tryign to persuade me (The fucking Crow). He likes tons of awesome movies, but he also watches some crappy movies. He has a wide taste, and I get to watch anything over there.

My mom tries not to let me see age-restricted films, but with all the different stamps on the boxes here in SA I just choose the one that fits what I want.

My mom also says nothig about my music or books. Or, she does, but here I never have to listen. Like when I read The Unbearable Lightness of Being, she said: "Why don't you wait a few years before reading that". And I just looked at her and said: "Why don't I just read it right now?" and I did. The same with music, as long as she doesn't have to hear Marilyn Manson she's fine.

[ie]

You'll find that you know nothing about yourself until you're at least eighteen years old. Why? Because that's exactly what happened to me. Something just happens at around the point. Your interests might change, but they gell and you really start to decide what's important and what's not important. You may have some kind of idea of how the world works, but the older you get, the more able you are to interpret that big vast planet you live on.


That said, I got into movies after I became of legal age, so I never had to worry about it all that much.

[kiddo]

A well-written post, captain'. Please update us whenever there's something happening in this "case". If it's of any importance or relevance, at least. I'm interested in hearing about it.

For me, this have never really been a problem. I remember going to the hospital in Sweden when I was around 9 years... I was going to operate (the oparation lastet for 11 hours, btw) the day after this boat-trip I made (from Norway to Sweden), and for the first time in my life, I was allowed to buy an action-film! The film was Metro (1997), I was in high spirits, and when we finally reach the hospital, I couldn't wait before I put it in the VHS-machine. I had to stay in the hospital for a couple of weeks (as far as I can remember) and I eventually saw alot of these more or less violent films; In the Line of Fire (1993) and The Ghost and the Darkness (1996) immidiately pops up in my mind. I especially remember the circumstances when I watched the last-mentioned. My dad had rented it, and we watched it together, me lying there in the bed with plaster from the knees and up to the chest, and him sitting by my side. Wonderful memories.

Here's the cover for Metro:



But oh well, now I'm just babbling with a distinctive feeling of nostalgia in my whole body, and I doubt this is of any interest to you. But what I'm kinda trying to say here, is that I think the fact that I had to lay still in a bed for weeks after weeks (this was over a long period, with severel visits on different hospitals), got my parents a little less strict on my film-watching, than what they might have been if I hadn't experienced what I did.

[mixed]

They vary in acceptance. Generally they dont get involved but sometimes they take minor interest and surprise me when they say, 'I'd like to see that'. I have been able to watch such films as the graduate and picnic at hanging rock with them and they've been alright!

[sacrilegend]

Haha, my mom asked me if I wanted to watch The Graduate with them.

The only real thing she has a problem with is violence, I mean,t he language she uses is worse than anything in any movie ever released anywhere, and she doesn't mind us watching sex, but I've noticed that if it's in bad taste she'll object, if it's arty and beautiful she doesn't mind.

[captainofbeef]

My mom has lightened up, she apologized for trying to tell me what to watch. I think she realized that it was stupid to start censoring my choices after about ten years of letting me do my own thing.

[sacrilegend]

Haha, my mom has realised the same thing, but about other things. She's still awful about films, though. Damn.

[malicious32dll]

Man, my parents fall for the dumbest shit... you know, like all the natural disaster movies and stuff.

[lordofdance]

My parents have so little knowledge of movies in general, and therefore absolutely no knowledge of most movies that I like, that their attempts at censoring what I watched was laughable. For some reason, my mother decided that Night of the Living Dead was a movie that I absolutely should not watch and she was vehemently opposed to me seeing it for a number of years. Little did she know that I was seeing waaaay worse on cable just about every weekend. Late night cable introduced me to so much sleaze and violence that my parents were clueless about. They left me alone a lot as a youngster, so the TV taught me a hell of a lot more than they did.

[sacrilegend]

Haha, I wish. My mom hates TV. And everything I rent goes through her.

[eatawiiner]

My mom watches anything and everything. She'll watch anything thats appealing.
My dad (r.i.p big man) was a serious Benny Hill fan. He got a kick outta that music and shit.

[Clark Nova]

My parents basically have no culture whatsoever. Their typical evenings consist of sitting on the couch, never saying a word to each other, and staring mindlessly at their precious American Idol or Law and Order. So yeah, didn't get my movie taste from them...but for a surprising few exceptions (The Third Man, On the Waterfront, many Hitchcocks...), so they're not completely lost. But foreign films? Forget it. well, at least they don't object to anything i watch or anything. They just let me be, and i'm cool with that.

[sacrilegend]

eatawiiner said:

My dad (r.i.p big man) was a serious Benny Hill fan. He got a kick outta that music and shit.

Aww, I'm sorry!

[sacrilegend]

Oh yeah, my mom watches (and worships) anything Almodóvar.

[captainofbeef]

^Which is probably why you dislike it I'm guessing.

[sacrilegend]

Definitely not, I haven't formed an opinion yet. And I wouldn't dislike somehting just because my mom likes it, really. It was just that one film...

[eatawiiner]

sacrilegend said:

eatawiiner said:

My dad (r.i.p big man) was a serious Benny Hill fan. He got a kick outta that music and shit.

Aww, I'm sorry!

THanks. it just happened at the end of April, so i had to deal with my entire family down in North Carolina for a week, which helped me come to terms with it. So now i just try to be as nice as he was to everyone, thats what i took away from it all.

[sacrilegend]

Oh ym word, I can't imagine how that must feel! I have newfound respect for you, that's amazing. I'd never come to terms with my father passing away, that's terrible. Wow, I respect the way you're handling it, the being-nice thing.

[criterionmaster]

sacrilegend said:

Haha, my mom asked me if I wanted to watch The Graduate with them.

The only real thing she has a problem with is violence, I mean,t he language she uses is worse than anything in any movie ever released anywhere, and she doesn't mind us watching sex, but I've noticed that if it's in bad taste she'll object, if it's arty and beautiful she doesn't mind.

Yeah, it always seems crazy to me when someone won't let you see a human body, yet will let you see it get ridiculously mutilated. Violence seems much more accepted in society then nudity does, wouldn't you agree? Glad my parents don't care about either, though. Me and my dad were complaining about this one movie (can't really remember what it was) that if it had some nudity maybe it would be more interesting, my mom was getting annoyed, haha! Plus, isn’t not seeing violence or something more your thing, then your mom’s? I thought you said before you didn’t like any violence?

lordofdance said:

My parents have so little knowledge of movies in general, and therefore absolutely no knowledge of most movies that I like, that their attempts at censoring what I watched was laughable. For some reason, my mother decided that Night of the Living Dead was a movie that I absolutely should not watch and she was vehemently opposed to me seeing it for a number of years. Little did she know that I was seeing waaaay worse on cable just about every weekend. Late night cable introduced me to so much sleaze and violence that my parents were clueless about. They left me alone a lot as a youngster, so the TV taught me a hell of a lot more than they did.

They must have watched Night of the Living Dead a really long time ago or something, and her memory of it probably made it seem way worse. The only thing remotely bad about that movie now is the naked woman zombie, which is still nothing.

I just remembered something my dad used to tell me not to watch, but we owned it, and that was From Dusk Till Dawn. Probably because of the whole "pussy, pussy, pussy" speech, and the strip club, with hundreds of naked woman, as well as all the insane violence , but I watched it anyway, and then we just talked about how good it was. I brought it up to him last night, saying "do you remember when you said I couldn't watch Dusk Till Dawn?" After having mentioned this thread to him, and we laughed about it. Then he goes "you still aren't allowed to watch that." haha.

I am glad my parents don't meddle in my watching’s much, but I also like that they know a lot about movies (well, more than most) and will watch anything I want them to.

police386 said:

My parents basically have no culture whatsoever. Their typical evenings consist of sitting on the couch, never saying a word to each other, and staring mindlessly at their precious American Idol or Law and Order. So yeah, didn't get my movie taste from them...but for a surprising few exceptions (The Third Man, On the Waterfront, many Hitchcocks...), so they're not completely lost. But foreign films? Forget it. well, at least they don't object to anything i watch or anything. They just let me be, and i'm cool with that.

Haha, my parents also watch those shows, just for some mindless trash. Have you ever tried showing them something foreign before?

Question for everyone: Have you ever showed your parents anything you have worked on? Film, painting, drawings, or otherwise?

[captainofbeef]

When I used to record my own music, I let them listen to it. They were honest too (especially my mom). If it sucked, they told me it sucked. So when it was good, I got a great feeling out of it.

[sacrilegend]

criterionmaster said:

Yeah, it always seems crazy to me when someone won't let you see a human body, yet will let you see it get ridiculously mutilated. Violence seems much more accepted in society then nudity does, wouldn't you agree? Glad my parents don't care about either, though. Me and my dad were complaining about this one movie (can't really remember what it was) that if it had some nudity maybe it would be more interesting, my mom was getting annoyed, haha! Plus, isn’t not seeing violence or something more your thing, then your mom’s? I thought you said before you didn’t like any violence?

I hate how violence is so acceptable these days, it's disgusting. The majority of parets would rather let them watch sickly violent films than even see a buttock.

See, I don't mind some violence, if it's done in a tasteful way. For me, it's like a car crash: I can't help to look, even though I don't want to, because it's so starngely, grotesquely attractive when it's done well. Not any old silly action movie (or something like The Crow, I won't ever forget, or forgive my dad for making me watch that with him). Maybe my mom instilled that hate of violence into me, because we're both that way. Although she thinks listening to Marilyn Manson and thing is violent enough. I kind of have an insatiable taste for some tasteful violence. See, I loved it in Sin City, although it scared me a tiny bit.

[sacrilegend]

criterionmaster said:

Question for everyone: Have you ever showed your parents anything you have worked on? Film, painting, drawings, or otherwise?

Well, I usually show my mom anything I ever draw or paint, and the only thing she criticizes is my technique. One thing that stands out is that once I was a waitress in my dad's restaurant, but all I did all that time was draw in my little book (for writing orders in) and it turned out a thumbnail series of the effects of the media and television, and dreams, and people wthout identities, and souls bieng eaten up by the television, and people being led to believe whatever they want us to believe. Unfortunately my dad didn't see the brilliance in it, and gave me a serious talking-to for not doing anything for those days but sit in the storeroom and draw. My mom also felt uneasy looking at them, she didn't see the symbolism, she saw something that looked very Marilyn Manson-esque. So, that fell on blind eyes...

[sacrilegend]

And also, I show my mom essays and pieces of writing I do, but she doesn't think they're as brilliant as I do, or as my teacher does. He encourages me, at least.

One thing my mom helps me with and is really passionate about is my drama, she loves my acting and she supports all the ideas I have for this show I need to direct in June. She is also a valuable source, since she studied drama for a lot of years and taught it for long, as well.

[criterionmaster]

sacrilegend said:

criterionmaster said:

Yeah, it always seems crazy to me when someone won't let you see a human body, yet will let you see it get ridiculously mutilated. Violence seems much more accepted in society then nudity does, wouldn't you agree? Glad my parents don't care about either, though. Me and my dad were complaining about this one movie (can't really remember what it was) that if it had some nudity maybe it would be more interesting, my mom was getting annoyed, haha! Plus, isn’t not seeing violence or something more your thing, then your mom’s? I thought you said before you didn’t like any violence?

I hate how violence is so acceptable these days, it's disgusting. The majority of parets would rather let them watch sickly violent films than even see a buttock.

See, I don't mind some violence, if it's done in a tasteful way. For me, it's like a car crash: I can't help to look, even though I don't want to, because it's so starngely, grotesquely attractive when it's done well. Not any old silly action movie (or something like The Crow, I won't ever forget, or forgive my dad for making me watch that with him). Maybe my mom instilled that hate of violence into me, because we're both that way. Although she thinks listening to Marilyn Manson and thing is violent enough. I kind of have an insatiable taste for some tasteful violence. See, I loved it in Sin City, although it scared me a tiny bit.

"Tasteful"? Sin City? He rips the dude's dick off in that movie. But I think I know what you mean; maybe you mean the way it is shown, or something, since that movie looks really nice and stuff. Is that what you mean? The Crow is a fun film, you seem to be overreacting, I don't remember it even being super violent. You probably wouldn't like it, though.

[captainofbeef]

The Crow is an awesome film, far from your normal action movie. And no, it really wasn't that violent.

[Clark Nova]

criterionmaster said:

Haha, my parents also watch those shows, just for some mindless trash. Have you ever tried showing them something foreign before?

It would be an effort in complete and utter futility. They wouldn't know who Akira Kurosawa was if he rose from the grave and walked into my living room with a shirt saying "Hello my name is Akira Kurosawa."

[sacrilegend]

captainofbeef said:

The Crow is an awesome film, far from your normal action movie. And no, it really wasn't that violent.

I know, I'm overreacting, but I thought it was awful and I cringed all the way through. Sorry, just not my style.